Latest Kort Report Newsletter February, 2011

http://archive.constantcontact.com/fs081/1102561682612/archive/1104300010342.html

I am excited to be going to London, England to offer my workshops for gay and lesbian couples and gay and bisexual males who are partnered or single.

I will also be offering a couple's workshop for all couples here in Michigan in March. 

I am writing for a popular magazine for gay men in the UK called, "Attitude", in which I answer questions from gay men about their lives. 

Read the newsletter for all this and more by clicking here 

The power of vulnerability

Brene Brown: The power of vulnerability | Video on TED.com

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Lady Gaga's new song is about gay children.

Logo Blogs: 365 Gay: A look at Lady Gaga’s “Born This Way” lyrics

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Couples Learn Valuable Lessons In the Movie Just Go With It

Couples Learn Valuable Lessons In the Movie Just Go With It - Yahoo! News

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Why Does That Arouse Me? Part 2

Why Does THAT Arouse me?

I am going to offer a teleseries to therapists and non-therapists on the popular teleclasses I have done on the topic os sexual desires, fantasies and behaviors. I receive many emails and clients coming to me having discovered something they found on the internet that has intrigued them but that may be taboo or disturbing to them and want to know why they are aroused by it. I have been successful most of the time in helping someone understand the nonsexual meanings as to why they are aroused by what they are watching or thinking about. 


All sexual fantasies are healthy. There are some that should never be acted on because they might be putting the person who has them or someone else at risk. I don’t believe there’s any pathology in our sexual fantasies or desires. Instead, I see them as a positive story about ourselves that’s trying to be told. Learning what the nonsexual meanings of our fantasies are can be very helpful.

For example, you might have a fantasy of being dominated and spanked. There’s nothing wrong with that fantasy and there’s nothing wrong with doing it. But what I want to help someone do is explore why they have that fantasy from a positive perspective and not necessarily pathologize it. Not in a negative way but in a positive way. What does that mean about you?”

Dr. Kort learned the benefit of helping people explore the origins of their fantasies through years of work with men who are addicted to sex and from those who have been sexually abused. By "cracking the erotic code" and learning the narrative of what the sexual desires mean can help you feel better about your sexuality and learn more about yourself.

  

Learn the hidden meanings behind what turns you on.

Fee: $15.00 Click here to purchase the audio. You will then receive the password to the page for download in an email.

Related Article: Depathologizing Porn: Why Can't It Be Just an Acceptable Diversion?


I would be very interested in knowing what you would like the teleseminar to focus on. You can blog here if you would be interested. 


I am thinking of things like talking about why people are interested in giving or receiving anal sex, cuckolding, BDSM, S&M, Fetishes, Group Sex, and everything between from vanilla to kinky sex!


Let's hear from you. 

Workshop for gay and bisexual men

Thursday, May 5, 2011
10 AM - 1 PM OR 7PM - 10PM 
Location: Beauchamp Lodge, 2 Warwick Crescent, London W2 6NE, UK.

There is also confusion about what is sex, what is love and what is intimacy. This workshop will explore the definitions of each of these and how to integrate them all together for gay men. Much of our culture as gay men, as well as for our heterosexual counterparts, are confused about how to make this integration. There is also confusion about how to have healthy sex, love and intimacy without having to have all of them combined. This workshop will help clarify all of this.

• How do you define sex?
• What is healthy versus unhealthy sex?
• Do you understand the secret logic of your sexual fantasies?
• What is your sexual shadow?
• Are you sexually addicted, compulsive or just have a large sexual appetite?
• Do you carry sexual shame?
• How do you feel about your body? 
• Do you want to improve your sex life? 
• Are you getting the love you want in your relationship?
• Are you keeping the love you find when you think you found Mr. Right?
• What is your definition of love?
• What is your definition of intimacy?

The goal of this workshop is to learn more about yourself as a gay man, develop tools and practices to live in integrity and be accountable, and to be able to identify your needs and communicate them effectively without your reactive mind getting in your way. It will also help you to develop strong relationships (both intimate and non-intimate).

For more information about this workshop go to http://www.joekort.com/dgaymen.htm 

What If It's Gay?: If God's Giving Out Gay Babies, Sign Me Up

What If It's Gay?: If God's Giving Out Gay Babies, Sign Me Up / Queerty

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Can you call yourself bisexual if you have never had sex with a member of your own gender?

Can You Call Yourself X if You've Never Y'd?

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Teenage defends his lesbian patents right to marry!

This video left me speechless.

Teenage man becomes internet sensation after defending gay parents | QueerUK

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Sarah Schulman discusses homophobia, family and her book Ties That Bind

She coined the term, "Familial Homophobia"

Sarah Schulman discusses homophobia, family and her book Ties That Bind

There is no such thing as being able to lengthen one's penis size

Don't believe any ad for lengthening penis size, it is all a scam--all of it.

Penis Size: The Measure of a Man? | Psychology Today

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Faking Orgasms?

More men think their partners are having orgasms than are having them. A recent study conducted at Indiana University found that 64% of women reported having an orgasm during their last sexual encounter, while 85% of men believed their partner had an orgasm the last time they had sex.

Shedding light on this discrepancy are studies on faking orgasms. Across several studies, the results are strikingly consistent: 53% to 67% of women report faking orgasm. As just one example, in a study of over 3,000 women who returned questionnaires distributed by mail and popular magazines, 53% said "yes" to the question "Do you ever fake orgasms?" Similarly, a study published in 2009 in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that 67% of 101 college women reported faking orgasm. The overwhelming majority who faked did so during intercourse.

Orgasms: You Can't Fake it Till You Make It | Psychology Today

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Gay Marriage or just marriage?

I totally agree with this author:

“Words matter. They shape how people think, especially about matters with which they are unfamiliar. And just as it’s not “gay lunch” or “gay baseball,” calling it “gay marriage” means it is different from “straight marriage.” It’s not.”

Let’s Finally Say No To ‘Gay Marriage’ | The New Civil Rights Movement

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The Love Drug--Oxytocin is only about love!

http://www.sciencenews.org/view/generic/id/69359/title/Love_hormone_has_a_dark_side

SAN ANTONIO — Oxytocin, a hormone with a rosy reputation for getting people to love, trust and generally make nice with one another, can get down and dirty, according to evidence presented on January 28 at the annual meeting of the Society for Personality and Social Psychology.


This brain-altering substance apparently amplifies whatever social proclivities a person already possesses, whether positive or negative, says psychologist Jennifer Bartz of Mount Sinai School of Medicine in New York City.

Previous work has shown that a nasal blast of the hormone encourages a usually trusting person to become more trusting (SN Online: 5/21/08), but now Bartz and her colleagues find that it also makes a highly suspicious person more uncooperative and hostile than ever.

“Oxytocin does not simply make everyone feel more secure, trusting and prosocial,” Bartz says.

These new results raise concerns about plans by some researchers to administer oxytocin to people with autism and other psychiatric conditions that include social difficulties, she adds.

Iowa trying to pass anti-marriage law for gays!

This is so full of prejudice, fear and hatred and has been going on a long time. In Michigan where I live and many other states, DOMA (Defense of Marriage Act) was passed to PREVENT gay marriage even when civil unions and gay marriages were not even legal--anywhere! Now Iowa already passed civil unions for gays but are trying to prevent it from becoming marriage.

I truly feel like what it must have felt like for African-Americans before civil rights movement.

The Iowa House today, by a vote of 62-37, passed an amendment (House Joint Resolution 6) that would deny any form of legal recognition for gay couples. The amendment seeks to prohibit not only the freedom to marry for gay couples, but also civil unions or domestic partnerships.

The bill now moves on to the Iowa Senate, where Senate Majority Leader Mike Gronstal has vowed to fight attempts to pass the amendment. If passed through both legislative bodies in two consecutive General Assemblies, the issue could be on the ballot as soon as 2013.

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Same-Sex Affairs: Men More Forgiving Than Women.

(CBS) No one likes being cheated on, but guys are more willing to forgive and forget when their girlfriend cheats with a woman than with another man.

In fact, guys are more than twice as likely to continue to date a woman who strays with a woman than one who has a heterosexual affair, according to a new study.

What about women who've been cheated on? They show the opposite pattern, saying they're more likely to continue dating a man who has had a heterosexual affair than one who has had a homosexual affair.

Same-Sex Affairs: Men More Forgiving than Women, Study Says - Health Blog - CBS News

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